I have watched a lot of TV. That's a fact. I don't watch as much TV as I used to, but I still watch a lot of TV. In the past, I have been known to watch some really, really terrible stuff.
I was on board for the very beginning of MTV's "The Real World" (when it launched in 1992, it was a truly great, groundbreaking, and important television show), and watched it until the Las Vegas season, when it just became about drunk, hot twentysomethings screwing in hot tubs...then, I stopped watching.
For a brief time, I was particularly fascinated by, and kind of obsessed with, the extraordinarily terrible programming of early aughts VH1.
I watched crap like "Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew" - In which D-List celebrities like Gary Busey, Daniel Baldwin, Tawny Kitaen, Amy Fisher, Leif Garrett, and others, would allow themselves to be recorded while spending time in rehab.
"The Flavor of Love" - Which featured Public Enemy hype-man: Flavor Flav, living with a group of crazy women, who were all vying for his affection
"The Surreal Life" - A reality train wreck in which a group of D-List celebrities like, Christopher Knight, Vanilla Ice, Tammy Faye Messner, Verne Troyer, Charro and more, lived together in a house for a few months.
There were many more (I can't even accurately describe my indefensible love of a thing called "Mob Wives"), and all of them were pretty rank, and I am reasonably embarrassed to admit that I watched this dreck. Now - and this is by no means an excuse - I was drinking pretty heavily at the time, and often watched these things deeply under the influence....but, even under those conditions, I should have known better.
I will say this, even at my drunkest, I never, ever watched a single minute of ANY of those Goddamn Kardashian things...and I still haven't seen a second of that nonsense. I suppose I had to draw the line somewhere, and the Kardashians seems like an appropriate place to draw that line.
Now, during that foggy period of "Nick Watches Craptacular Television," I discovered, and began watching the American version of "Big Brother" (we can actually thank the Dutch for creating this thing, their version aired first) on CBS.
It was (and is) a reality show that takes it's name from the character in George Orwell's "1984," and, incredibly, it debuted on July 5th, 2000...which means that it's been on the air for over 24 years, and it's in it's 26th season.
The apt description from Wikipedia reads:
The show broadly follows the premise of other versions, in which a group of contestants known as "HouseGuests" live together in a specially constructed house that is isolated from the outside world for a cash prize of $500,000 (or $750,000 in the 23rd season onwards). The HouseGuests are continuously monitored during their stay in the house by live television cameras as well as personal audio microphones. Throughout the course of the competition, HouseGuests are evicted by being voted out of the competition. In its inaugural season (which followed the original Dutch format and audience voting determined evictees and the eventual winner), ratings declined and critical reaction grew increasingly negative, prompting the series to be revamped for the second season, which focused on competition and gameplay.
That's about it....and I have been watching it religiously since 2004. Yep, I have been watching it for 20 years now. It's the only surviving example of crap-reality-shows that I still watch, even though I am now sober.
It started out as an outrageous five-nights-a-week commitment, and has gradually turned into an outrageous three-nights-a-week commitment (not counting the Live Feeds you can watch anytime, 24-hours-a-day).
I LOVE "Big Brother." I know it's stupid. I know it's a waste of time. I know that it's NOT the least bit real. I know that everyone thinks I am a loser...but, I don't care, I love it.
I love the set-up, the execution, the games, the drama, the twists & turns. I love the Houseguests (kudos to CBS's Casting Department for consistently choosing hilarious, awful, funny, charming, attractive, weird, and varied people to live in the house), and I love rooting for certain goofballs, and watching each episode leading to the ridiculous finale.
It makes my summer go by more entertainingly, and it's given me a TON of material to talk about on my radio show in the past, and on The Nick D Podcast currently.
If you're a fan (and I know A LOT of people who are), you know how much fun this thing is, and just how addictive, hilarious, annoying, stupid, maddening and delightful it can be.
You LOVE things like ZingBot, OTEV, BB Comics, Caged Eggs, Pressure Cooker, and The Wall. You remember classic Houseguests like: Dan Gheesling, Derrick Levasseur, Will Kirby, Cody Clafiore, Rachel Reilly, Danielle Reyes, Jordan Lloyd, Taylor Hale, Nicole Franzel, and of course, "Evel" Dick Donato.
You follow every "Showmance," bitch about the outcome of competitions and evictions, laugh at the fights, and root on the "good guys." You complain about the stupid "Battle Back" competitions, and roll your eyes at the decisions made by the dumber houseguests.
And you continue to watch, even though you're just watching a bunch of half-naked dipshits, whispering in bedrooms for hours and hours.
All the while, you wonder how in God's name the TERRIBLE Julie Chen Moonves got the gig as host (umm, just look at her last name), and why people love her so much....or maybe all of that stuff is just me.
We are currently just four episodes into the latest season, and it's too early to pick a favorite house guest to really root for (although I like Joseph - The Mustachioed Video Store Clerk, Rubina - The Bubbly Filipino Bartender, and, especially, T'Kor - The Former Chicago Southsider Crochet Enthusiast), and the drama hasn't really started, but I am totally on board.
As I was preparing to write this, I thought I'd go to Paramount+ and watch the very first episode of "Big Brother" from July 5th, 2000. Wow...you need to check it out, because it's incredibly weird and HUGELY different than what the show is now.
I won't ruin any of the fun you can have simply by watching it, but I will share THESE THREE PHOTOS:
And, that quickly sums up some of the weirdness that was on display 24 years ago.
Trust me...it's worth watching.
So, to all my fellow "Big Brother" fans: have a blast watching Season 26, and, of course:
Expect the unexpected.
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